Where is Porta Rico?
Now that is a tough question to answer. Prefixing a name with "Porta" usually means that it's portable. Take porta-potties for example...
So Porta Rico could be just about anywhere, and where it'll wind up next is known only to the person(s) doing the porta-ing.
...and that, Your Honour, was when I ran like hell and hid until the bullets stopped flying.